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Diddy Kong Racing

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Reviewed by Ben Kowal I would just take a moment to inform sensitive people who like this game, please leave or you may cry. If that wasn't enough of a hint, my review for this game is ALL negative. And if you disagree, E-mail me. I would like to hear what you like about this game. It stinks and there is no way to make this game better. Please, please E-mail me and tell me why this game always gets good reviews.

Graphics 0 out of 100

The graphics were pretty bad. The only time you get a head on view and actually see the dreaded little monkey's face, it looks awful, even for just a drawing in a sketch pad. Most of the time, if you hit a wall, the camera goes behind it, making it impossible to see. Walls are also made out of squares the size of...well...let's just say they are so badly hid that you can fit four ugly squares on your TV, any more makes the game slow. It's just junk.

Music and Sound 0 out of 100

The games music was pretty bad, but not nearly as bad as the FX. This game was crap. I mean that whol-heartedly. I found myself turning the volume off in about two minutes. The game could have been a lot better, but No. It had to be like this, the people said. Baah! The game's music and sound were just plain irritating.

Game Challenge 0 out of 100

The game was way too easy, if you could get it to work. Which you usually couldn't, by the way. Here's the real deal. When Rare released Goldeneye 007, they thought they'd be so popular that they could make money off anything. And sadly, they were right.

Game Play-Fun 0 out of 100

The controls were so bad on this game that constantly I was checking to see if my controller was plugged in. And fun? None of it. It seriously lacked anything good. The solution : Don't, I repeat, DON'T buy this crappy game.

Rumble Pak 0 out of 100

I could have sworn that the rumble pack was not vibrating, but there was a dump truck outside. Preferably, I thought that because the rumble pack rumbled with no relation to the game, and it was all random.


Frustrating? Frustrating because nobody except an internet friend shares my point of view. If their is somebody else who agrees, than E-mail me. Seriously, the game control was so bad that you were frustrated when you found out you can't turn right...or left..... or break....or go....It's just common sense not to buy this game.

Replayability 0 out of 100

Nothing. It offers no replay value. That is all I have to say.

Game Value 0 out of 100

Now listen carefully : DO NOT BUY THIS GAME!!!!! DO NOT BUY THIS GAME!!!!! DO NOT BUY THIS GAME!!!!! Got that? It would make good spare parts if someone will sell it for 30 cents...well, maybe only 25. Oh, well.

Crappiness 100 out of 1

As I've insisted, this game is crappy. Let me spell that for anyone who didn't catch that. C-R-A-P-P-Y.

Overall -9 out of 100

Stinky, crummy, crappy, smelly, useless, terrible. I mean that with all my heart. Actually, I wouldn't waste my heart on this game.

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